Tag: Grief

Greetings on this the Wednesday of the Twenty-seventh Week in Ordinary Time
Readings: Gal 2:1-2, 7-14; Ps 117:1bc, 2; Lk 11:1-4
Notes:

Speaking of the first reading a few days ago: I am amazed that you are so quickly forsaking the one who called you by the grace of Christ for a different gospel, I would like to share a story from this week.

We had the Catholic funeral liturgy for a beloved member. The Vigil service, Funeral Mass and the Committal Rite. All carefully prepared and the liturgy meticulously followed according to the faith.

We gathered:

1. To pray for the soul of the dead (mercy, forgiveness, and the beatific vision).
2. To pray for one another in consolation (love, unity, forgiveness).
3. To remember our baptism into the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ (salvation economy).
4. To remember the sure hope of the resurrection and the mercy of God (the Divine Will).

After the graveside service the Funeral Director took it upon himself to orate for 20 minutes straight. And essentially demand the family and friends gather around the coffin for an extra-liturgical expression.

The worst part?

He started with: The real reason we are here…

Really? You know the real reason. See the list I provided above items one to four.
In speaking with his coworker, he told me this FD does this all the time.

Shameful!

• Funeral Director has a competence and role distinct and true.
• He is not the spiritual director of the family and grieving.

• I know he meant well and for that he gets this gentle warning.
• At most he can provide comforting context when the context is not already provided.
• He is there to provide concluding comments such as: ‘Thank you for coming’, and ‘This service is concluded’.

After three days of meticulous and exact theological understanding, developed over millennia, the FD decided of his own ego to declare, ‘the real reason’. He was not asked to do that. He is of unknown theological basis. He is unknown ordination or appointment. He did not read the discomfort of the family gathered to his expectations. He had zero understanding of interfaith practices.

Apparently he does this all the time.
Yikes!

I have done many interfaith services and faith services of other traditions, great and meticulous care must be given to represent the faith tradition of the grieving, not my own. His activity is a slap in the face of all religions and traditions and interfaith practices.

Why does it matter?

Because he is not in the position to declare the purpose of the gathering, the theological framework of the gathering nor listened to the words of the liturgy provided. The family and their ways are the paramount canon.

Some of our prayers are 2,000 years old given by the Lord himself!

How closed can a person be in such a moment!

I am writing this as a neglected reality. In the modern world, I am amazed that you are so quickly forsaking the one who called you by the grace of Christ for a different gospel. In your context it is fine. But in the context of a family with distinct and specific religious tradition, no, not at all.

Today is also the Optional Memorial of Saint Faustina Kowalska, virgin.
She is an impactful saint in the western church. Her modern era life (August 25, 1905 – October 5, 1938) and her diary has inspired millions to a life of loving the Lord and acting justly.

Saint Maria Faustina Kowalska’s Story here:
https://www.franciscanmedia.org/saint-of-the-day/saint-maria-faustina-kowalska

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

First reading
When they saw that I had been entrusted with the Gospel.
But when I saw that they were not on the right road in line with the truth of the Gospel, I said to Cephas in front of all…

Responsorial Psalm
Go out to all the world, and tell the Good News.

Alleluia Verse
You have received a spirit of adoption as sons through which we cry: Abba! Father!

Gospel Portion

This! This is our focus:

Father, hallowed be your name,
your Kingdom come.
Give us each day our daily bread
and forgive us our sins
for we ourselves forgive everyone in debt to us,
and do not subject us to the final test.

Peace be with you,
Deacon Gerry

Wordless Wednesday October 12th for photos of St John of the Cross.

These are the signs of faith and symbols of office used at the funeral:

Book of Gospels

Crucifix

Deacon Stole

Cleric’s Pall, lower left, folded.

Peace be with you,

Deacon Gerry

Greetings on this the Memorial of Our Lady of Sorrows
Readings: 1 Cor 15:1-11; Ps 118:1b-2, 16ab-17, 28; Jn 19:25-27
Notes: The image today is from the Camino de Santiago. There I found the Crucifix often with Jesus on one side and the Blessed Mother on the other. She suffered a dry martyrdom on the cross.

Our gospel portion today (Jn 19:26-27) is the fulfillment of the gospel portion LK 2:35.

(and you yourself a sword will pierce) so that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed (LK 2:35).

Women are the first to know the pain of loss. From Eve to Mary, Sorrow over the children. Your grief is known to Mary and she prays for your consolation.

Adam again had intercourse with his wife, and she gave birth to a son whom she called Seth. “God has granted me another offspring in place of Abel,” she said, “because Cain killed him.” (Gen 4:25).

First reading
For I handed on to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures; that he was buried; that he was raised on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures; that he appeared to Cephas, then to the Twelve.

Responsorial Psalm
Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good.

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his mercy endures forever. Let the house of Israel say, “His mercy endures forever.”

Sequence
http://deacongerrypalermo.blog/2022/09/15/stabat-mater/

Alleluia Verse
Blessed are you, O Virgin Mary;
without dying you won the martyr’s crown beneath the Cross of the Lord.

Gospel Portion
Fulfillment

Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son.” Then he said to the disciple, “Behold, your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home.

Peace be with you,
Deacon Gerry

Stabat Mater dolorosa, which means “the sorrowful mother was standing“.

Sequence – Stabat Mater – Holy Mother
At the cross her station keeping,
Stood the mournful Mother weeping,
Close to Jesus to the last.

Through her heart, his sorrow sharing,
All his bitter anguish bearing,
Now at length the sword had passed.

Oh, how sad and sore distressed
Was that Mother highly blessed
Of the sole begotten One!

Christ above in torment hangs,
She beneath beholds the pangs
Of her dying, glorious Son.

Is there one who would not weep,
‘Whelmed in miseries so deep,
Christ’s dear Mother to behold?

Can the human heart refrain
From partaking in her pain,
In that mother’s pain untold?

Bruised, derided, cursed, defiled,
She beheld her tender Child,
All with bloody scourges rent.

For the sins of his own nation
Saw him hang in desolation
Till his spirit forth he sent.

O sweet Mother! font of love,
Touch my spirit from above,
Make my heart with yours accord.

Make me feel as you have felt;
Make my soul to glow and melt
With the love of Christ, my Lord.

Holy Mother, pierce me through,
In my heart each wound renew
Of my Savior crucified.

Let me share with you his pain,
Who for all our sins was slain,
Who for me in torments died.

Let me mingle tears with you,
Mourning him who mourned for me,
All the days that I may live.

By the cross with you to stay,
There with you to weep and pray,
Is all I ask of you to give.

Virgin of all virgins blest!
Listen to my fond request:
Let me share your grief divine.

Let me to my latest breath,
In my body bear the death
Of that dying Son of yours.

Wounded with his every wound,
Steep my soul till it has swooned
In his very Blood away.

Be to me, O Virgin, nigh,
Lest in flames I burn and die,
In his awful judgment day.

Christ, when you shall call me hence,
Be your Mother my defense,
Be your cross my victory.

While my body here decays,
May my soul your goodness praise,
Safe in heaven eternally.
Amen. (Alleluia)

Greetings on this the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross
Readings: Nm 21:4b-9; PS 78:1bc-2, 34-35, 36-37, 38; Phil 2:6-11; Jn 3:13-17
Notes: I cannot speak for everyone but for me, when I am worn out I make my biggest mistakes. Mistakes in muscle movement, choice of words, reactions to stimulus, and decisions on actions to take in the moment. I can fall, I can harm, I can do the very things I warn others about: engage in Advantage, Alliance and Acquisition.

This is the cross we bear, no? The decision?

Circumstances come. Decisions we control.

Thankfully the solution is of divine origin!

Today we venerate the cross but it was not always so. The cruelty of the cross (worldwide) was not lost on so many who saw their own die this way. It takes reflection to realize the Lord transformed this horrible instrument of death into an instrument of life, a place of rest for the weary soul.

Antiphons of the Liturgy today

Ant 1: To destroy the power of hell Christ died upon the cross; clothed in strength and glory, he triumphed over death.
Ant 2: The Lord hung upon the cross to wash away our sins in his own blood. How splendid is that blessed cross.
Ant 3: How radiant is that precious cross which brought our salvation. In the cross we are victorious, through the cross we shall reign, by the cross all evil is destroyed, alleluia.

O Cross of Christ, Immortal Tree

O Cross of Christ immortal tree
On Which our Savior died.
The wood is sheltered by your arms
That bore the crucified.
From biter death and barren wood
The treee of life is made;
Its branches bear unfailing fruit
And leaves that never fade.

O faithful Cross, you stand unmoved
While ages run their cours;
Foundation of the universe,
Creation’s binding force.

Give glory to the risen Christ
And to his Cross give praise,
The sign of God’s unfamthomed love,
The hope of all our days.

Stanbrook Abbey Hymnal
Benedictine Nuns of Stanbrook Abby.

First reading
With their patience worn out by the journey,
the people complained against God and Moses,
“Why have you brought us up from Egypt to die in this desert,
where there is no food or water?
We are disgusted with this wretched food!”

The LORD said to Moses,
“Make a saraph and mount it on a pole,
and if any who have been bitten look at it, they will live.”
Moses accordingly made a bronze serpent and mounted it on a pole,
and whenever anyone who had been bitten by a serpent
looked at the bronze serpent, he lived.

Responsorial Psalm
Do not forget the works of the Lord!

I will open my mouth in a parable,
I will utter mysteries from of old.

(note: prophecy fulfilled. This is why I speak to them in parables, because ‘they look but do not see and hear but do not listen or understand (Matt 13:13).

Second reading
The second reading is Saint Paul quoting a verse from an early hymn of the church.

Rather, he emptied himself,
taking the form of a slave,
coming in human likeness;
and found human in appearance,
he humbled himself,
becoming obedient to death,
even death on a cross.

Alleluia Verse
We adore you, O Christ, and we bless you,
because by your Cross you have redeemed the world.

Gospel Portion
Jesus said to Nicodemus:
“No one has gone up to heaven
except the one who has come down from heaven, the Son of Man.
And just as Moses lifted up the serpent in the desert,
so must the Son of Man be lifted up,
so that everyone who believes in him may have eternal life.”

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son,
so that everyone who believes in him might not perish
but might have eternal life.
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world,
but that the world might be saved through him.

Peace be with you,
Deacon Gerry

Greetings on this the Memorial of Saint John Chrysostom, Bishop Doctor of the Church
Readings: 1 Cor 12:12-14, 27-31a; Ps 100:1b-2, 3, 4, 5; Lk 7:11-17
Notes: The title not to be mistaken for Universalism.

• Grief is universal experience.
• Salvation is a universal need.

Reflection (Franciscan Media)

John Chrysostom’s preaching, by word and example, exemplifies the role of the prophet to comfort the afflicted and to afflict the comfortable. For his honesty and courage, he paid the price of a turbulent ministry as bishop, personal vilification, and exile.

Chapter 7, Year II.

Yesterday (except we did Holy Name of Mary): The Healing of a Centurion’s Slave.
Today: Raising of the Widow’s Son.

Luke is asserting both Jesus’ concern for Gentiles and for widows. God’s offer of love and restoration is Universal, both Jew and Greek, man and woman.

Grief and prayer. In today’s gospel portion we do not know anything more than the widow and the entire town was in grief over the death of this young man.

• We do not know of their state of sanctification.
• We do not know of their prayers or worship of foreign gods.
• We do not know anything at all except they are foreigners and they are in grief.

Jesus knows.

Jesus raises up.

Like the widow of Zarephath, who was preparing for the death of her and her son given the dire food shortages, she had silent prayer known only to God. Perhaps so silent that she herself did not know she was praying. Yet, the Lord heard the groaning of the Holy Spirit for her. Speculation, yes. Silence, absolutely.

First reading
For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one Body, whether Jews or Greeks, slaves or free persons, and we were all given to drink of one Spirit.

Responsorial Psalm
We are his people: the sheep of his flock.

Sing joyfully to the LORD, all you lands;
serve the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful song.

Alleluia Verse
A great prophet has arisen in our midst
and God has visited his people.

Gospel Portion
When the Lord saw her,
he was moved with pity for her and said to her, “Do not weep.”
He stepped forward and touched the coffin; at this the bearers halted,
and he said, “Young man, I tell you, arise!” The dead man sat up and began to speak, and Jesus gave him to his mother.

God is for you, always.
Jesus knows.
Know him.

Peace be with you,
Deacon Gerry